Life is precious

 I was reminiscing yesterday on what a miracle it is to become a mother. From a little girl I always wanted to be a mother. I would envision twins. Normally twin girls. Their names were going to be Amber and Tymber. My mom said look out “Tymber” as if a tree were falling in the woods. As I grew older I still thought how awesome it would be to be a mother, but no longer did I dream of twins. Highschool came and went and then I entered college. I dated very few guys and was always searching for someone to love me and want to eventually marry me. I did not want to date someone if they did not seem interested in marriage. What was the point of wasting time on someone if they did not want marriage or children for that matter. I had entered my third year of college and went home on a break. During the break I had a terrible accident which killed my step sister and almost killed me too. I went through several surgeries and had to learn to walk all over again. The doctor’s did not think I would be able to have children let alone walk. My dreams of becoming a mother was being taken away from me or so I thought. I was in a wheel chair for 5 months and I pushed myself hard because I did not want to be seen in the chair. I did not want people to stare at me and feel sorry for me. In pushing myself I made the bars in my back move into my muscle. I had to endure yet another surgery to remove the bars. I began to heal once again and I was able to walk on crutches. This got quite old so me being stubborn decided to get rid of the crutches and just walk. I caused myself a lot grief and pain, but I was determined to walk. In February 6 months after my accident I met Brian. We hit it off from the start. He had the most dreamy blue eyes and was just so handsome. The biggest thing is that he went to church. I always wanted someone who was a Christian and nothing like my dad. I did not want someone who drank or smoked. Well, God knew exactly what I needed when he sent me into Brian’s path. We had a whirlwind of a romance.  We dated 6 weeks and got married.  We did not have a fancy wedding.  I wore my Aunt Teresa's gown and he wore a gray suit.  We went to Greenup, Ky and got married.  My mother in law did not want us to get married in front of the justice of the peace so we found where the nearest preacher was and he owned a funeral home.  Yes I got married in a funeral parlor.  You know the saying "unto death do us part."  We took it literally!  Ha!  We were married 4 years before we decided to have children.  My first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage.  I was about 10 weeks along when I started having problems.  The doctor did a D & C and told me to wait 6 months before we tried again.  This emotionally drained me.  I had been through so much and the thought of not having children came to mind.  God had helped me to be able to walk again.  Would he help me to have children?  In March exactly 6 months later I got pregnant once again.  As I progressed in the pregnancy they thought I was having twins.  They did an ultrasound to find I was having a boy.  ONE boy!  I knew his name would be "Zachary" which means "God hath remembered".  God certainly had remember us!   Two and a half years after Zack, along came Logan.  We were not sure what to name Logan.  I liked Andrew, but knew people would call him Andy and I just did not like that at the time.  We took a picnic lunch down to Chief Logan state park and Brian saw a statue of Chief Logan.  The Chief was standing tall and proud and he said "Tina what about Logan, Logan Andrew?"  I liked the sound of that and the baby kicked within me.  I guess Logan liked the sound of his name as well!  I thought we were done having children.  I have to have c-sections, so I was happy with  2 healthy boys.  Then in 2006 we decided to try for yet another baby.  Isaiah was born in May of 2007.  I had, had some problems during the pregnancy with major fluid retention and pre-eclampsia.  When Isaiah was born he had problems breathing and had to be taken to ICU.  I never got to hold my baby for 2 days.  He was hooked to all kinds of wires.  I cried and cried.  The staff did not know if Isaiah was going to make it or not.  We had different church congregations praying for him and on the 4th day around 4 am all his vitals went to perfect.  That evening they brought my baby to me to hold without any wires.  The first time in my room and alone at last!  He was so beautiful!  All my boys were beautiful babies!  Zack weighed 8 lbs 1ounce, Logan weighed 8 lbs 5 ounces (3 weeks early), and Isaiah weighed 8 lbs 12 ounces ( 3 weeks early).  The joy of pregnancy no man will ever understand.  Sure as the baby gets bigger they can feel it kick, but it is nothing compared to what goes on in the inside of us.  The changes we go through are just magical!

 I loved every minute of being pregnant even if the tidy bowl man became my best friend!